Hovering over your child's every move, making every decision, being side-by-side to protect them...sound familiar? You may be part of the debate of "helicopter parenting". When does it become too much ? How does a child learn to succeed if he/she does not fail? In order for them to tackle challenges, they need to fail in order to pick themselves up and learn from it.
Last year, I had my students respond to the article, "The Growing Backlash Against Overparenting" by Nancy Gibbs. Quiet a few of them said they could relate to the notion of helicopter parenting. Not sure if they were confusing typical teenage/parent relationships at that age or if they truly felt over-parented.
What do you think? Helicopter or free-range?
Related Articles/Discussions:
The Growing Backlash Against Overparenting by Nancy Gibbs
Times Magazine
November 20, 2009
Are Helicopter Parents Affecting the Transition to College? (discussion)
New York Times
October 11, 2010
Related Books:
Helicopters, Drill Sergeants, and Consultants: Parenting Styles and the Messages They Send
by Jim Fay
The Idle Parent: Why Less Means More when Raising Kids
by Tom Hodgkinson
Colette,
ReplyDeleteMy parenting differs with the age of my children. I am more of a helicopter parent when it comes to my 10 year old, than my almost 18 year old. However, I have found I will hover if I feel my children don't know the consequences of their decisions - even with my 20 year old.
I am not a parent yet, but when I reflect upon my own parents style of parenting, I don't feel like there was a lot of 'hovering.' Honestly, they did probably a great balance of the two. I totally agree with the fact that some parents of newer generations are not allowing them to fail and it's creating a different type of individual and student in our classrooms. In the future, I hope to not be a parent who hovers!
ReplyDeleteI wish I read your blog post 20 years ago. I believe that I protected my children too much. My older one is very smart, and school was maybe too easy for her. So she was drawn to things better left alone. I worked hard to keep her from failing, while she went out of her way to find ways to to fail. SIGH... We all learn, sometimes the hard way.
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